Alright alright, CALM DOWN CALM DOWN!

Listening to : Nothing, still euphoric over the Mighty Kop grabbing an amazing win!
Daily Fat Joey Bagpuss Feeling Check: Little queasy (He moved about as I was driving wildly)

Football Results of Importance:
Liverpool FC V AC Milan - 3-3 (3-2 Pens)
Queens Vault Rangers V St Kellys Construction - 5-9

OH MY GOD I CANT HARDLY BELIEVE IT! The Reds on top of the European footballing elite, in my lifetime???? It was a dream which I believed would only become a reality when ear hair would be a relevant problem, or when finally I would begin to fall from riding the tide of technological advance, resorting to asking the next generation to set everyday appliances up for me. My fave Liverpool player, good old Vlad, got a cracking goal too - all the more sweet as he's off in the Summer back to Lens. The win has given me great joy but has also forced me to eat my words. Liverpool were the underdogs... FACT. I had shown endless amounts of pessimism about their European campaign.....FACT. I thought Liverpool were going out to Chelsea but in fact they did not.. FACT. Am I the worst fan in the world? Oh great and wonderful Shankly, willst thou forgive my lack of faith? I know many Scousers would surely not!

The Rangers suffered a blow against a worthy adversary this week. We looked terrible - no real shape, no real defence and the attack was not up to scratch. Overall, we could have played better but a good response of 5 goals ensured me that scoring may not be a problem in the future. We have proved we can score under pressure at least. Now we stand at 2 wins, 3 losses.

Tardis spotting is not a hobby of mine but when the Doctor comes local, you have to take an interest. The current Doctor Who series is currently being shown on BBC1 every Saturday and a few episodes have been filmed in my very own hood. Ive seen my church be attacked by Time-Vortex-Repairing-Dragon creatures, as well as witnessing my neighbouring street be a part of 1941 London during the Blitz. I started watching the show just to see Grangetown and Cardiff in general, but now I must admit Im enjoying the show much more than I first thought. I now must see each episode without fail! I never thought that Billie Piper would become part of my essential list... EVER!

Still not eating crap. I feel loads better overall. I think im starting to experience the benefits ever so slowly!!! I have pondered about morning runs, but can I really be arsed? Tell me, can I really be arsed???

Not much more I can say at the mo, so HOW for NOW. (remember that show? Truly awesome!)

Political and Economic Theory.... with Cows

This interesting set of definitions was discovered by Jen a while ago. It presents meanings for some hard-to-explain topics in politics and economics, by using the example of perhaps one of the greatest animals on this planet - the Cow. Might I add, young Rachel once stated that if I was ever to be an animal it would be one of these friendly creatures. Her reasoning? I shall leave the obvious to your imagination regarding the size, but also that I am quite docile and a bit sloth. Still to this day, I wonder whether that was a compliment or not. Anyway, enjoy!!!

FEUDALISM - You have 2 cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

PURE SOCIALISM - You have 2 cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone elses cows. You have to take care of all of the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need.

BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM - You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone elses cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs as regulations say you should need.

FASCISM - You have 2 cows. The government takes them both, hires you to take care of them and sells you the milk.

PURE COMMUNISM - You have 2 cows. Your neighbours help you take care of them and you all share the milk.

RUSSIAN COMMUNISM - You have 2 cows. You have to take care of them but the government takes all the milk.

CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM - You have 2 cows. The government takes both and shoots you.

DICTATORSHIP - You have 2 cows. The government takes both and drafts you.

TOTALITARIANISM - You have 2 cows. The government takes them and denied they ever existed. Milk is banned.

PURE DEMOCRACY - You have 2 cows. Your neighbours decide who gets the milk.

REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY - You have 2 cows. Your neighbours pick someone through vote to tell you who gets the milk.

SINGAPOREAN DEMOCRACY - You have 2 cows. The government fines you for illegally keeping two unlicensed farm animals in an apartment.

AMERICAN DEMOCRACY - the government promises to give you two cows if you vote for it. after the election the president is impeached for speculating in cow futures. the press dubs the affair 'Cowgate'.

BRITISH DEMOCRACY - You have 2 cows. You feed them sheeps brains and they go mad. the government denies any responsibility.

BUREAUCRACY - You have 2 cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

CAPITALISM - You have 2 cows. you sell one and buy a bull which you use to breed the other cow as well as every other cow in the area. then you start exporting sperm from the bull to emerging markets. After several years of expansion your company floats on the stock exchange. The SIB eventually intends legal proceedings against you and your spouse for insider trading. After a lengthy court battle you are found guilty and sentenced to 10 years in prison of which you actually serve seven weeks. When you come out of prison you buy two chickens. Then....

HONG KONG CAPITALISM - You have 2 cows. you sell three of them to your publicly listed company using letters of credit opened by your brother in law at the bank then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax deduction for keeping five cows. The milk rights of six cows are transferred via a Panamenian intermediary to a Cayman Islands company secretly owned by the majority share holder who sells the rights to all seven cows milk back to the listed company and proceeds from the sale are deferred. the annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. meanwhile you kill the two cows because the feng shui is bad.

ENVIRONMENTALISM - You have 2 cows. the government bans you from milking them or killing them.

FEMINISM - You have 2 cows. they get married and adopt a veal calf.

POLITICAL CORRECTNESS - You are associated with (the concept of ownership is a symbol of phallo-centric, warmongerism, intolerant past) two differently aged (but no less valuable to society) bovines of unspecified gender.

COUNTER CULTURE - wow dig it, like theres 2 cows man, grazing in the hemp field. youve got to have some of this milk!

BOTULISM - You have 2 cows. they get into spolied grain...

PURE ANARCHY - You have 2 cows. either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbours try to take the cows and kill you.

LIBERTARIANISM - whatever...

SURREALISM - You have 2 giraffes. the government requires you to take harmonica lessons. the sun rises in the north on alternate Tuesdays.

NEW LABOUR - You have New cows. New Cows New Britain. Our Mission New Cows. New Britain. New Cows New Britain.

The Spectacle at Sophia and the Miracle of the Midlands

Listening to : Weezer - Make Believe
Daily Fat Joey Bagpuss Feeling Check : Fairly Intimidated (I moved him to the place underneath of the CD player)

Recent Football Results of Importance:
Weekday/Weeknight Argos Staff V Weekend Staff - 4-9
Queens Vault Rangers V YMCA - 4-1

Im feeling good today. The revising is still there as an ever increasing worry of course, but overall I have a lot to be thankful for. Im off to the land of the Cypriots post exam and the diet Im currently on is not as hard as I thought it would be. I agree with those who say it's all about adjustment of the regime you resigned yourself to. Im starting to truly think about what Im eating, when before I gave no thought what so ever. Cheeseburgers and Steak Bakes did not fret me at all as mere snacks; now after watching Super Size Me and realising their high positions in the Weight Watchers point scheme, it shocks me how I could disrespect my body in that way. I have now apologised to my body since this education, vowing to give it the love and attention it needs - even if that means no more Maccy D's.

The football game of the century at Sophia Gardens lived up to the hype and the expected underdogs grabbed a resounding victory. Our side, the Weekenders, had looked to be slightly weakened by the loss of our red hot keeper Leighton Marsh who went over the frontier to join the Weekday/Weeknight staff. Until half time, it seemed that his defection proved to be fatal as we went down 4-2 despite some positive play. As keeper, I conceded 2 goals which made a comeback look completely out of reach. However our striker Matt Reid was in top form and was eager to add to his goal tally of his previous two. He proved to rip the defence into shreds with his fancy footwork, so we changed tactics to tighten defence and play him alone up front. This brought forth a goal frenzy, as Matt grabbed 5 more, plus one each for Tom and Stewart. I watched from the goal with little to do as the defence were superb - good thing really considering my goalkeeping talents!!! It was a great night - the drinks were flowing later on and the comedy of Leighton was all the entertainment we could ever need.

The Rangers won too - we played a new side who had no idea of the rules of the game. Their play was very lax with no man marking, which enabled us to play some awesome passing and moving into our game. We had over 40 shots Im sure! Their keeper deserved a medal however as he became a virtual brick wall as plied on the pressure. A win none-the-less, 2 on the trot!

The relegation battle has really surprised me this year and Im glad it was a nail biter for a change. Congrats to West Brom and of course our City golden boy, Robert Earnshaw, who will both look forward to another season of top flight football after a 2-0 victory over Portsmouth. To call it a miracle is an understatement - they all must have been praying at the Hawthorns on Saturday night before the game!!! To think, I tipped Norwich to win at Fulham and take that survival space.... shame on me! Those 6 goals put past them surely isn't a good way to go down fighting, like they had done so well over the last couple of weeks. Oh well, what about Wigan? Jewell has worked wonders but I think the high life ends here - they'll be back down Ninian Park before you can say J-J-B.

I use this opportunity to wish Jenny well on her exam tomorrow, knowing confidently that it will go exeedingly well. I wish a good luck to all of you out there who are also revising hard and are taking exams this year. Dont panic! Before long, it will be adios to education for another summer.

My own work needs attending to now so I depart dearest blog! Remember - just because you croak along to a remix of a movie theme classic like Beverly Hills Cop, it doesn't make you cool, funny or even clever. :D

Remember this stuff when you were a kid? Brio was the awesome wooden train track kit, which you able to play with in the ELC in St. David's Shopping Centre. Im putting a pic up as I remember an intense debate not so long ago about the name of this amazing kids toy which brought so much joy to all! Look how advanced it is now! A Sky Train! Wonders will never cease. Kids have it soooo good these days!!!  Posted by Hello

Coincidence? I think not!!!

Listening to : Queens of the Stone Age - Songs For The Deaf
(This is a regular part of my blog now, so I defy all those who question its importance!)
Daily Fat Joey Bagpuss Feeling Check : Quite jovial
(New feature to the blog, although I don't see it lasting)

So it's official. I am not actually allergic to cats or dogs, despite hysterically coughing in two cat filled scenarios. I demand a second opinion!!! Although the doctors have announced that all is well my hatred of feline kind remains, not to be confused with pussy of course :) - (Im sorry, I haven't used that gag once yet!).

Revising is soooo energy draining. You could be all singing and dancing at 9am before beginning a hard core revision session, only to finish feeling like you've ran the London Marathon three times over afterwards. I forgot how tiring it can be. The human traffic within the library doesn't help either; I am always forced to retreat into the coffee shop with Jen after finding my books, basically because the place is jampacked like a tin of sardines. Not to mention the fact that because there are so many people taking all the tables in groups, it is never quiet! Exam time in uni is never fun. Although Im sure for some of you out there, these aspects you know only too well.

My mind is geared on Sunday's big Argos football game for some release. In addition I cannot forget the showing of 'Good Will Hunting' tomorrow night at Casa del Payne, I haven't been disappointed by a Affleck-Damon joint effort yet. They have mainly starred together in some awesome Kevin Smith films like 'Dogma' and 'Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back' which were masterpieces of cinematic art. Check them out if you haven't already.

Although every bone in my body strongly resists pitying the most annoying enity on Planet Earth, I must shed a tear for Manchester United, who have been taken over by the American sporting kingpin, Malcolm Glazer. If United were ever to suffer big time, I just wished it was on the pitch for their football, not on the basis of their bank balance. Possibility of the world's richest football club going bust? Man, it could only happen in the States. Or in this case, the crazy game of football.

Im going to have to bring this brief episode to a close for now as the Chinese I have eaten tonight is bouncing around my stomach like a cat on fire. I mean not to offend you cat loving people out there but if you have paid attention to my blog, you will know why I use such a distasteful metaphor. Until next time avid readers and to the star of the show, my blog, ta ta.

You will not believe how interesting this article actually is when you get into it. Although at first its really hard to take seriously. Posted by Hello

Sweet Victory... at whatever cost!!!!

Listening to - Jetplane Landing - Zero For Contact
Queens Vault Rangers V Welsh Wizards - 5-4

As I may have or may have not informed you, the Tuesday football team I play for has new gone under a new alias - the Queens Vault Rangers. The old name was despised by all the team, so a change was well overdue. Going into toinght's game, we have lost two out of two, 4-1 and 6-1. So its quite obvious we were desperate for a win, but the magic of the fixture list had meant we had toi fight for it against our most hated rivals - the Welsh Wizards. A young aged side with mouths as big as goldfish bowls, with a reputation to gloat heavily after very goal scored. They had also failed to win a game this season, so a win was essential to stay off the foot of the table. The first half was mixed as we went up a 2-1, only to go down 3-2 by half time. We all stared at the abyss and I particularly felt at my lowest ebb. We couldnt go down to these cocky upstarts. With man marking sorted, we regained control of the game and held on for a 5-4 win. Sloppy football, hacking and dirty tackles on both sides (I admit I got in on the act) and overall a shaky performance, but well worked for. Once more they failed to shake our hands, a trait I cannot stand in football. I sincerely hope it was their age and lack of maturity which explained this unsportsmanship. Well done lads, now lets move on for better things!!!

Im currently looking forward to the Argos football game on Sunday. The Weekenders will be taking on the Weekday staff, in a game which I hope will have a lot of supporters to watch and a hard fought contest. Not to mention two of the managers will be playing which will spice things up just a little bit!! Dont fret, I shall give an in depth analysis of the match in this very blog!

Tip for all - dont buy Syphon Filter - The Omega Strain for the PS2, its a HUGE disappointment. Those avid Gabe Logan fans who adored the previous PSX games may find it hard to control, very frutstrating and too far from the original. AVOID AT ALL COSTS!!!!

Other than that, Auf Wiedersehen Herr Blog!

Sums up my current pre-exam period. Posted by Hello

The Aftermath

Listening to : Rotten Apples : The Best of - The Smashing Pumpkins
Amount of Sleep needed after Election night - A Helluva lot
Election Satisfaction - Exciting, tiring, frustrating..... pretty usual really!

3 cups of coffee were simply not suffice to fight the enemy of sleep on that Friday morning. I bowed out at 2:30, not long after the announcement of the Independent candidate Peter Law as the new MP for Blaenau Gwent. The important thing however, was the witnessing of the Cardiff South and Penarth result roughly at 1:45. Alun Michael romped home with a good 10,000 vote majority, destroying any slim hopes I ever had of a change here in Grangetown. One can dream, in a Labour stronghold. Hey, that sounds like a good song title.....

Moving on dear blog, I must congrat Jen on her promotion to the dizzy heights of jewellery management. Well done my love, I had no doubts about you getting it. A tip - dont go power mad, for I have been known to be drunk on the power many a time. May the Elizabeth Duke Dept. be enriched with your dazzling abilities.

On another note, I feel this blog has become more of a weekly event which is not acceptable. I will make sure that I will write on a more consistant basis! Im sick of writing about each day as it is a week! This injustice is one of my top priorities to address.

FAT REPORT! FAT REPORT!

Yes I havent given up yet! And damn those who assumed I had already started tucking into a Quarter Pounder with Cheese for my lunch! I am starting to feel the loss and some trousers have been dusted off and worn once more. My target for next week is attempt more exercise - my regular dosage of football is not enough to make further progress. Hello six pack? Maybe not just yet!

The new age of Thursday football began at Hunters Green, Thornhill and incorporated the true soccer element of God's green grass. Much to my disappointment however, it had lost the edge of the Sophia atmosphere. I moaned about Sophia, now I moan about Thornhill - not to antagonise, but it is a heartfelt opinion. Guys help me out here.... is this the way to go? The constant bickering of throw in calls was tedious. The blasting of the ball 5 feet away from goal meaning that the ball would go deep into the stingy nettle bushes was first funny, then hugely annoying. Am I just being picky? Am I too used to the urban surrounding of the inner city conctrete court? I was geared up for grass but it wasnt the same. Am I alone in these thoughts?

It was nice to meet up with old friends as always, Rich and Rach, Matt and Lyn, Steph and James, as well as Shelly and Gareth. We had a very enjoyable meal, discussed the potential crapness of Jen's new phone and there was talk of a boys night out on the cards soon! Result! Its always good to keep in touch with old friends and I admit I should make more of an effort sometimes.

Today I worked. Now I must retire, for the fatigue of the election night is hitting me quicker than a Vodka and Red Bull could ever do. Good night my faithful blog.

The Beginning of the End

Listening to : Hot Hot Heat - Elevator

It seems our journey is almost at an end. I admit I havent been here to guide the quest in finding the perfect political candidate for Cardiff South and Penarth, nor have I have enriched you in the climate of the political world as much I planned. Rest assured, I will aim to remedy this in these final days! I sincerely hope that you are voting on Thursday, even if it is for a lesser known party.

My life over the election period has been eventful to say the least. I have had to submit the very document which determines my academic career, wrestle with a breathing problem triggered by encountering cats of the feline variety (I twisted that phrase from Jen's dad, he had to get a mention for it) and have attempted to spread the word of May 5th to the electorate. In between, the quiz team have experienced success in consectitive weeks at the Hollybush and of course, the final game at Sophia Gardens between the teams of Chris and Dale. In all, it has been very busy and fun filled!

Today in contrast, is very different. I sit at my desk with the pamphlets of the Cardiff South and Penarth candidates in my hand. Soon I will have to make a choice of who to vote for, which I have found to be more perplexing than first assumed.